franklin J

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Posts by franklin J

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  24

  Fighting experience?

  by bebu in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  the other night our son confessed that he had been in an after-school fight last friday.

  some small kid was irritated with my son (who's nearly 14) and called on the services of a big friend to beat up my son.

  (i actually saw the fight (sort of) as i drove past the school that day to go do errands, and pondered on whether i should stop... i didn't... because i actually wasn't sure it was a fight; it was a lot of kids in a loose crowd).

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  franklin J

  as a boy growing up I was in my fair share of "squabbles". It is definitely a boy thing.

  My parents never taught me to fight; to defend myself; yes, but not to fight. They based their instructions on the Christian motto - "turn the other cheek". As a result I was usually pummeled; and walked away to find a teacher to speak to . That action cost me the respect of my peers. The philosophy carried with me into adulthood and it took some tough experiences ( not fights) to teach me to be "assertive"---a very different perspective than being aggressive. And light years differnt then "turning the other cheek".

  In response to this I have taught my son to fight back --not as an agressor--but as self defense. I think it is important for "the other kid" to know that the victim will "fight back" and inflict some damage. Most of the aggressive kids are bullies anyway, and will back down when they realize that they do not have a scared victim.

  As for the school, they understand the difference between "picking a fight" and " self defense".

  Frank
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  41

  I've avoided the elders so far...but could this all change on SATURDAY?

  by logansrun in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  well, it has been almost three years since i silently and dramatically vanished from the world of the watchtower.

  moving an hour away from my congregation's territory and not answering phone calls was all i needed to avoid having to wear the letter "a" on my chest.

  but, that could all change this saturday.

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  franklin J

  hang tuff, Bradley.

  Do accept the invitation to your sisters party---why allow them to intimidate you.

  DO NOT give them any information about yourself; your puirsuits or any of your studies. DO NOT allow yourself to be dragged into a conversation about your spirituality. Expect them to do this. When it occurs; just smile at them and either walk away or tell them that this is not the time or place and change the topic of conversation. If they push it you just tell them you will not discuss it. End of story.

  good luck, Frank
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  66

  recommend some new music

  by tijkmo in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  .

  have you found some new band or artist that you would reccomend we listen to...for this to work we would need to know what style of music you normally listen to and then we can know if its what we would enjoy...eg.

  i like pink floyd...genesis...yes...etc.....................and have just found mercury rev......brill

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  franklin J

  try listening to Phillip Glass, some say he is classical; some say new age.

  I think his music is mesmerizing.....but you either love it or hate it.
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  28

  a card came yesterday...

  by bavman in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  ....from my mom.

  i hadn't heard from my parents since last summer after 2 fiery letters and me da'ing myself.

  they even mentioned to my df'd sis how i "went apostate".

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  franklin J

  I am sorry to hear this. Hang in there. They will come around.

  This religion is UGLY and does UGLY things to people.
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  33

  "Lunch with Ted and Melita Jaracz" {photo enclosed}

  by sf in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  .

  wonder just when this was taken.

  i thought he was a bit younger looking then this: .

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  franklin J

  ....he will never make it to the cover of GQ ( Gentlemans Quarterly, magazine)....
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  27

  Tone of the current literature

  by TheListener in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  i haven't started a thread in some time but this is something that has got me thinking.

  i want to know if i'm off-base here or if others have noticed this too.is.. over the last several months (perhaps 6-9) i feel that the tone of the wts and kms have been very strong.

  not strong in the sense of legalistic do's and don'ts but strong in the sense of do more!!!!

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  franklin J

  hey guys, 25 years ago they had the same message " brothers, the end it so close; we must continue the preaching....blah blah"

  I suppose we can say they are consistant with the Bull$&%!!, ALL THESE YEARS LATER
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  88

  Am I right about the WT being wrong?

  by FreedomFrog in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hi everyone.... i was "raised" as a dub and got baptised in '86...so in total i had been a jw for over 20 years.

  i came to realize that the "way of life" i was living was in fact made up of mostly lies.

  i started "questioning" the borg about 6 years ago and finally came out with almostatheist last sept. i know in my heart that they are mostly wrong and very legalist.

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  franklin J

  Hi freedom frog

  to your topic, yes, you are correct in your assessment of the Watchtower. They are wrong.

  I have been out for over 20 years; I sent myself into therapy to deal with the culture shock and I was "deprogrammed". It took time to get away from it all. I surrounded myself with non JW activities and new non JW friends. Build a new support network of friends on the outside. This is so important.

  good luck, Frank
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  19

  Patriotism And All That..

  by Englishman in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i've noticed that ex dubbies tend to become quite patriotic once they've left the witnesses.

  actually, scrub the patriotic, i mean very patriotic!.

  it's odd really..we don't give much credence to king or country whilst we're in the dubby brigade, yet once we're out, we seem to become a bunch of flag waving scallywags with the best of them.. i wonder if we're using patriotism as a replacement for the loss of a controlling influence that we feel when we leave the witnesses?

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  franklin J

  interesting question, Mike.

  in my case it was more a desire to be Patriotic ; not so much to replace the "fervor" or Watchtower worship, but more to do something benign of which I was "denied" for so very long.

  Besides; I (like so many others) like to belong to a larger "whole". I do feel like I am an "AMERICAN" when I can salute the flag at a ball game and sing the National Anthem.

  I take Pride in that.

  I suppose I took pride in being a good JW also; different times; different circumstances. So back to your topic---perhaps it is a human instinct--being the social animals that we are--to want to belong and be a part of "something".
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  45

  Question for those raised a JW

  by New Worldly Translation in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i was wondering if anybody feels like i do that if i hadn't been raised a jw i would never have embraced the religion.

  i know it's easier to say in hindsight after i know the truth about the org but honestly i don't think i would have given them the time of day.

  i'm not a religious person or even a spiritual person and being a jw always caused a conflict in my mind.

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  franklin J

  this is a good question;

  I firmly believe that I am a product of my experience in life; JW background included. I like to keep a very open mind about things and this is a direct result and rebellion from the "closed minded thinking " I was taught as a JW.

  I am not so sure I would be the same without that "fascist" upbringing. Without that experience to teach me, my life may have taken a different tac; and I am not sure which wind would have blown my sails.
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  19

  Watchtower Pictures

  by RichieRich in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i was discussing with my mother (still a jw in good standing) and we were laughing about how in every watchtower, when they show "good christian witnesses" at someone's home or doing family activities, they always wear khakis, without fail.

  and whenever they show "worldly" people, they are wearing jeans.

  have y'all noticed this?

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  franklin J

  the Watchtower images depend heavily on stereotypes....but in reality the world is never the "black or white" which they depict.